Catechism of the Catholic Church - Section 1641 - Reflecting on
(1641) "By reason of their state in life and of their order, [Christian spouses] have their own special gifts in the People of God. This grace proper to the sacrament of Matrimony is intended to perfect the couple's love and to strengthen their indissoluble unity. By this grace they help one another to attain holiness in their married life and in welcoming and educating their children.
Too often we enter into marriage, walk through the changes, and struggle with the problems as if it is all on us to make the marriage work. We often wait until things get really uncomfortable before we seek direction and help. But God wants so much more for us and is always calling us to seek His assistance.
As stated in this passage, our marital covenant comes with “special gifts” of grace that are specific to our needs as a married couple. God wants to give us grace at every moment and in every circumstance, but often we don’t ask Him for it, and He won’t force it on us. I often encourage couples to pray for God’s grace in every aspect of their lives and to be open to whatever He wants to show them, teach them, or give them in any particular situation. This can be hard at times since we often pray with an expectation of God to answer our prayer in the way we would like it answered. But God knows best what we need in any situation, even if the answer is ‘no’ or ‘not now.’
But as this passage states, through His grace, God wants to shower on us assistance in “attaining holiness” in married life and in being open to having and raising Godly children. God wants our marriage to succeed and grow in love and peace even more than we do. But we have to be willing to let go of having a ‘my will’ mentality and be open to having a ‘Thy Will’ approach. And the success of this way depends on our willingness to ask for the grace and to be docile to the Will of God.
ACTION STEP: This week, seek more as individuals and as a couple to ask for God’s grace in the critical areas of your marriage and family life.