Love Bears All Things

During several therapy sessions that got into some very difficult issues, I have heard spouses say, “I didn’t sign up for this!” I find it important to remind couples that yes, you did sign up for this when you made your marriage vows. (Please note, I am not including abuse and safety issues in this statement.) What else are we promising, but total fidelity, when we say, “In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, in good times and in bad, until death do us part”? Too many people don’t realize the weight of their words in this oath to each other.

Love calls us to bear all things. Life is going to be bumpy, and we are going to make mistakes, sometimes big ones. Love, however, calls us to bear our own sinfulness through seeking forgiveness, making amends, and changing our bad patterns. It also calls us to forgive our spouse for their failings, as we would like to be forgiven. As a part of this process, we need to make a plan to heal brokenness and repair trust. 

To truly help one another reach heaven means that we need to first honor our vow to stay true to each other even in the tough and vulnerable periods of our marriage. Second, we must keep our promise to bear all things, meaning that even though we see one another’s short-comings and bad patterns, we will work together to improve ourselves and our relationship. Finally, love calls us to take up our cross and follow Christ, who first bore all of our iniquities with love.    

ACTION STEP: This week, in little ways, or maybe in a big way, seek to work through a difficult issue between you and your spouse with patience, understanding, and forgiveness.