Sub-Mission - Part 1
“Be submissive to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, be submissive to your husbands, as to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:21-22).
Many people, when they hear the word “submissive,” immediately associate it with terms such as “slave,” “serf,” or “doormat.” Living in a world where people have treated one another as objects to use, rather than persons to love, we often connect “submissiveness” with weakness and the objectification of a person. Because of this, we may miss the authentic meaning of this word in the context of this beautiful scripture passage. To re-discover the message of Ephesians 5, I would like to break this word down into its roots and unpack what St. Paul intended to convey. As we explore this passage, please also keep in mind that women were not seen as equals in Jesus’s time. St. Paul’s writing in this passage reflects Jesus’s message of salvation, which challenged the idea that women were lesser persons and which affirmed their inherent dignity.
Submission means to be “under (sub) the mission” of someone or something else. Ephesians 5 first calls spouses to be “submissive to one another,” then goes on to instruct wives to be “under the mission” of their husbands. This includes honoring and respecting their husbands as well as setting an example for their children in this regard. Today, though, many women are not willing to be under their husband’s mission. A wife may feel this way for many reasons: She doesn’t trust that her husband’s mission is life-giving, she doesn’t believe that he has her best interest in mind, or perhaps she has been wounded by so many men that she believes all to be unworthy of trust.
Because of this, it is important for the husband to know his part in this equation if he wishes to inspire his bride to freely, whole-heartedly submit to him. In order for our wives to be under our mission, we actually have to HAVE a mission, a truly good one that seeks the best for every person in our family (and most particularly for our wives). St. Paul spells out how husbands should do this in the last nine verses of the Scripture passage, and I will be reflecting on these over the next several weeks. Until then, though, I will sum up his message in this way: Marriage is a Sacrament of sacrifice and service. Christ is the perfect model for men in how to live that out. If we want our spouse and family to follow our lead, we must first submit ourselves to Christ and His will for us.
ACTION STEP: This week, read Ephesians 5:21-33 with your spouse and pray that God will guide you in living this passage out in your marriage.